Wife : Why do I have to submit to my husband?

Our preaching this Sunday isn’t about marriage but our pastor started with the question, “Why do I have to submit to my husband?” We are all assuming that the question came from the wife.  Wives : time to inhale.. exhale.. 😧  The pastor answered it with this : Because God commanded us to.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. Ephesians 5:22

It’s simple. God told us to do it. Yes it is hard for women like me to do this especially when we know that our decisions are also right (most of the time even better than our husbands’ decisions). But once we obey God’s commandment to submit to our husbands, we will definitely have a reward — may it be in good relationships, material blessings, promotion in our career, healthy life and even a radiant beauty is possible. Wives, let us expect more blessings when we honor and submit to our husbands.

Next question : Can I just submit to him on other things only? Not EVERYTHING? 😓 The answer :

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Ephesians 5:24

Wives we need to submit to our husbands in EVERYTHING. But how? Do you want your husband to have good choices? Pray for him. Pray for wisdom and guidance. We as wives can always suggest; but in the end we still have to submit. Submission is the key to a happier marriage. 💑

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

Husbands, and you think you can already laugh about this? No! 😝 You have a bigger and harder responsibility. 

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Ephesians 5:25

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

Husbands, you should love us as Christ loved the church. You should give up yourself for your wife. Husbands should prioritize his wife next to God and more than anything and anyone else in the world. You should love us like this :

In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church. Ephesians 5:28-29

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

Husbands, how much do you love yourself? What is your routine to make sure that you look great day by day? If you love yourself so much that you take care of yourself daily, that is how you should take care of your wife as well. You must be connected to each other that when she is hurting, you are hurting too. You cannot hurt her because you’ll be hurt too.

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

I don’t want to brag but I have the best husband in the world. Well, I’m sure you too will say that you have the best husband right? We all do. But mine is extraordinary. He is my best friend and my husband in one. He knows me more than anybody else.

When me and my husband were starting, I have to give up so many things for him and our family. Like instead of me buying something for myself, I prioritized him instead. I even have to sell all my things just so we can have money. For many years, I did that so we would be able to survive. My husband asked me to stop working so I would have a healthy pregnancy (I have a threatened abortion and placenta previa at that time). I need to give up my career so I can submit to him and for our baby’s safety.. but he loved me even when I reached 210 lbs. In times I was insane because of depression and sadness, he stayed with me and loved me even more. He didn’t leave me even after I had all the pimples in the world. 😅 He always tells me that someday he will give this and that to me.

I never thought that this day would come. A day when God will bless him so much so my husband can also bless me more. My husband gave me more than what I gave up.. even more than what I ever imagined. He gives me what I need and buys me things even before I tell him I want it. Most of the time those are the only things we argue about — he wants me to buy something for myself while I want him to buy something for himself instead. He loves me so much that I tend to take his goodness for granted. I was so used to it that I didn’t see his efforts anymore. I magnified all the things I did for him before that I ignored how much he loves me up until now. I am a BLESSED WIFE.

I love
I love him more and more each day.

I am reminded of how great God is to our marriage while listening to our pastor. I realized many things. I am always mad at my husband for always minding me and making sure that I look pretty. He keeps on buying me things just so I’d look prettier each day. I didn’t realize that if I never submitted to him and God’s will — I won’t experience all the things I’m experiencing now. I am what I am because of God and for using my husband as an instrument to always love me and take care of me. This article is dedicated to him. I want to thank him for all the years he stayed with me and for loving me even more than he loves himself. He has been a good father to our children and the best friend I could ever have. I love you ga!

Our children will be a good father and husband because of your great example.
Our children will be a good father and husband because of your great example.

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Ephesians 5:33

Pastor said, “It’s the little decisions that we made in the past that will show a great impact in our future.” Do we have a good or a bad marriage today? Whatever your answer is, try to remember a time that you made a tiny (wrong or right) decision. Then from there try to remember the fruits of those decisions. How did those decisions end? If it’s a good result, give yourself a pat on the back. If it’s not, it’s time to fix your marriage.

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

My take on this : Marriage is a perfect partnership between you and your spouse. You are 2 imperfect people who are joined together so you can be a perfect help for each other. Of course we have differences! That’s the best way for us to finish our race easier — because we already have someone who is strong when we’re weak.. someone who has another skill that we’re not good at. Couples tend to complement each other. Your strength is his weakness and vise versa. If husbands and wives will finally understand that they are partners, they won’t waste their time arguing over petty fights anymore.

Is it even possible?

With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God. Mark 10 : 27

Are you struggling with your marriage today? Do you want to give up? Listen. Does God want you to stay in your marriage longer? Listen to what He’s trying to tell you. Do it NOW. Obey God NOW then follow this prayer with me :

Father, I am having problems with my marriage. I cannot do this without You Lord. I need you to intervene in our marriage and be in the center of our relationship. Lord, we need Your help. Be in our lives. We are asking for forgiveness in all the wrong things we have said against each other and the things I’ve done to hurt (name of spouse). I acknowledge that I am sinful and I cannot do this without You. Cleanse my heart and change it with a new one that loves my spouse so much. Remind me of my vows and help me to commit with what I promised to (name of spouse).

Wife : Help me to submit to my husband and learn how to listen to what (name of husband) wants me to do. Humble me Lord and let me see all my mistakes so I can ask for forgiveness to (name of husband) as well. Lord, help me understand what You want us to do in our family. Help us in all the decisions that we are going to make. Give wisdom and understanding to my husband so we’ll be able to follow Your will in our lives. Thank You Lord for now I am a new creation. I will be a better wife and a good example to our children.

Husband : Lord, help me be the man that (name of wife) and my children will be proud of. Teach me how to prioritize my family and love (name of wife) as I love myself. Give me the strength to apologize in times that I need to humble myself and say sorry to (name of wife). Lord, let us be united and always be together in all the decisions that we will do. Help me to listen in what You want me to do and always give me the ability to love (name of wife) even beyond her imperfections. Lord, thank you for (name of wife) and for the love you have given for both of us. I will lead my wife and my children to the right path with Your help God.

Both will say : In Jesus name we pray, amen!

What’s next  : Kiss and hug each other tight. If you are far away from each other, call your spouse and tell him/her how much you love him/her. Share this article with him/her so he too can pray and understand God’s purpose in your marriage. Say it all out. Nobody should love you more than God and your spouse. Your children are meant to leave you but your spouse is destined to stay with you forever.

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

For counselling, please visit : The 700 Club Asia. For Filipinos, please call 8107176. or 8107717 if you need a local church or someone to pray for you. Be blessed and stay in love!

“Love is not a fight, it is something worth fighting for.”

“Never leave your partner especially in a fire.”

Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.
Photo is not mine. Credits to the owner.

These quotes are from my favorite movie that saved our marriage as well. This is the trailer for the movie Fireproof.

My question now is : How far would you go to save your marriage? Love doesn’t move in mysterious ways. As long as God is in the center of everything in your relationship, love is possible.

Do you have issues in forgiving one another? Please visit my other article about : Forgiveness.

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13 comments

  1. This is a great post. I have struggled with this in the past, I took ‘wives submit to your husbands” as a worldly thing instead of taking it how God intended it to be and I ended up fighting with my husband all the time. Very informative. I love the movie Fireproof, my husband and I watched it at a time when we were struggling and it truly helped. Right after, I went to the library and checkout “The Love Dare” and did the things in the book. I love the pictures of your family. You and your husband look very happy together.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for the compliment. To God be the glory. Right back at you! 😊

    This is exactly one of my reasons for blogging — to inform and share the things I learn while running our race in life.

    I understand what you mean. When I posted this article, many of my friends asked how to submit to their husbands. It is really a struggle for us women; especially to those who have strong personalities. It is also an eye opener for me to finally understand that submission to our husbands mean obedience to God and once He is pleased, everything will follow.

    I love Fireproof. In times I tend to forget, I watch it over and over again. Husbands should also remember that we are God’s princesses and once they hurt us, they are hurting God’s child. Right?

    Thank you for dropping by. I love your blog as well. It’s so refreshing to read a blog from a Christian mom like you. We all have a happy family because of Him alone. God bless you!

    Like

  3. Thanks for sharing.
    For my wife and I, it has now been 26 years being married. Yes, there has been bliss, but it also has had it’s rocky times, but God is faithful.

    From a husbands side, I find my role in a Christian marriage extremely hard to fill. In between the verses that was shared in the post comes the verse in Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” Christ gave His life up for the church. He went the distance. I hope I don’t have to die for my wife, but if the situation arises I need to be ready. In the meantime it is dying to my own wants and needs, and making sure the needs of my wife are met, day in and day out.

    it is a compliment of wives submitting to husbands. When we each do our part, putting the other ahead of our self, it is a beautiful thing. Marriage is God’s idea, and Ephesians is the instruction manual.

    ~Carl~

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wow Carl! 26 yrs of marriage? Now that is AWESOME!

    I agree to what you said : In the meantime it is dying to my own wants and needs, and making sure the needs of my wife are met, day in and day out.

    It is true. Marriage will be easier if the husband thinks that way and wives will submit easily because of that.

    You know what? I only have 1 question though.. I had it from a reader. Do you think it’s ok for wives not to submit if the husband is irresponsible and even hurt his wife?

    Liked by 1 person

    • An excellent question. The 1st thing is if the wife’s physical safety is at stake, she needs to get away immediately. This is paramount. Sadly domestic violence has led to a lot of deaths that could have been averted.
      It really depends on the individual situation. I have seen wife who have become Christian, and the husband would reject her new found faith. It would have been a lonely road, but she continued to love and honour. Her physical safety was never an issue. In time the husband was impressed by this faithful love and honour, he became a Christian.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thats great Carl! But what if both of the couples are Christian? Does the wife still need to submit to her husband even if the husband is irresponsible? It’s a matter of submitting from the start right? Then everything should follow. But what if it’s been a practice that the wife doesn’t submit because the husband can’t be trusted? I guess one thing is there should be forgiveness then God’s grace will follow if both of them would pray to God and ask for help. Marriage is tough if one is not cooperating and God is out of the picture.

    Liked by 1 person

    • let’s pray for that dear. the hope of being a good wife instead of having a good husband is already a sign that you are too willing to submit and be the best wife that your husband could ever have. 😊 always always pray for your future husband. pray for him that God will direct him to the right path until he meets u. God bless u

      Liked by 1 person

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    Like

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