Popular

This article is based on Ariana and Mika’s music video Popular Song. It made me remember the bullying I experienced when I was younger. (If you haven’t seen the video yet, I suggest that you watch the video first before reading this so you’d understand what I’m talking about)

As the song goes : You were the popular one, the popular chick. It is what it is, now I’m popular’ish. Standing on the field with your pretty pompons. Now you’re working at the movie selling popular corn. I could have been a mess but I never went wrong. ‘Cause I’m putting down my story in a popular song. My problem, I never was a model. I never was a scholar, You were always popular. You were singing, all the songs I don’t know. Now you’re in the front row. ‘Cause my song is popular. 🎤🎵🎶🎼

Fact : I spoke with my classmates before and we noticed that those who were “popular” before weren’t able to maintain their popularity and even got worse compared to us who were not popular at all. 😕 Some were able to maintain their popularity but their heads became too big that their hearts are already consumed by their “popularity.” 👏

Song says : I was on the lookout for someone to hate. Picking on me like a dinner plate. I hid during classes, and in between them. Dunk me in the toilet now its you that cleans ’em. You tryin’ to make me feel bad with the things you do. It ain’t so funny when the joke’s on you. 🎵🎶🎼

Real Life : I still remember how I was bullied. I got accelerated for 2 years which makes me the youngest in almost all my classes. Since I’m still young, I started Grade 6 when I was 10. I didn’t have the strength and the courage to fight for myself. They would throw away my bag from the 3rd floor of the school. Some of them will call me different names like Ewoks and Japwet (pwet is ass in English); then sing songs of insult that are dedicated to me. Some will make friends with me and ask me to do their assignments / projects then ask money when they need it. They even called me Belle of Beauty and the Beast; then after everything I’ve done for them, they revealed that Belle is short for “belbel = belly fat” 😢 Some of them would question me for passing the entrance test in UST then tell me that I shouldn’t be a Tourism student because I’m fat. They said that I should be a Food Technology or Restaurant Management student instead. Actually, I was bullied even by my family-in-law who made fun of me in social media because of my weight. My heart was crushed… 💔 but that caused me to pursue on losing weight and finding ways to look good.

Sing with me : Popular, I know about popular. It’s not about who you are or your fancy car. You’re only ever who you were. Popular, I know about popular. And all that you have to do, is be true to you. That’s all you really need to know. Catch up, cause you got an awful long way to go 🎵🎶🎼

Truth be told : We define those who are “popular” and “unpopular.” You can be popular if you believe that you are. You will always be “unpopular” if you think others are higher than you.

The thing is, “popular” people belittle those who are “unpopular” and it happens because the “unpopular” allow the “popular” to do it to them. “Never allow anyone to make you feel inferior without your consent.” You know your capabilities and where you’re good at. Don’t let them tell you otherwise. 🙉

One thing I noticed in this video is the absence of the teachers in the campus area. Yes they are physically present; but in the “bullying” situations, they’re usually NOT fully aware. That’s the main problem of our schools : either they ignore the bullying or they themselves do the bullying. There’s this “gay” teacher (take note : a gay teacher in a Christian school) who told me in the middle of our ENGLISH class, “Ano feeling mo maganda ka na kasi lahat ng kabarkada mo magaganda? Pwes hindi!” Even teachers are bullies!

I still remember the times that my classmates spit in my water jug, tear my notebooks a few days before our exams and those who embarrass me in front of the class. It made me feel small and inferior to the point that those experiences were deeply rooted in my heart to make me become stronger. 💪 (Note : I am emotional in making this article because I have to remember everything they’ve done to me before; but God is good for giving me the ability to forgive ALL of them.)

Though teachers are to blame, parents will always be the key for the child’s emotional and social development. I grew up in a world where I’m not allowed to have a wound/scar. My mom will hit me (directly to the new wound/scar) everytime I have a new one. She wants me to have a flawless skin so I’d become a flight attendant like my aunt. To achieve that, I’m also not allowed to play out of the house which is the main reason why I grew up in a small world. Parents are a big influence for us to grow confident and happy. My parents didn’t do an excellent job in those aspects that’s why I always feel insecure. Now that I’m already a parent, I don’t fail to tell my children how proud I am to have them. We see to it that we always appreciate their works and say good things to them. We always hug them and tell them how much we love them. The world is too cruel nowadays so we just have to be extra careful and cautious of the possible things they’ll experience in school and their environment. If you’re a parent and you noticed something unusual from your children, talk to them about it and be sure to be with them along the process.

In the last part of the video, “Popular Song” people became stones because of the poison they drank. I believe that bullies (popular people) tend to be like that — because they’re too confident, their hearts turned into stones that will eventually lead them to their own destruction.

Bullying can be stopped if and only if parents would love and protect their children more. If you’ve seen the whole video, you’ll noticed that Ariana also put a poison on Mika’s drink which proves that kids who were bullied also bully other kids in return. Hurting people hurt other people. Ariana showed a perfect example of a friend who can turn her back from you when “jealousy and bitterness” strike. Yes, they’ve been through a lot of things together, but in the end, Ariana managed to kill Mika (a friend who helped her have her own revenge).

In this video, it simply shows that Ariana at some point used Mika as an instrument to do her revenge. Her unforgiveness caused her to forget about friendship and have the same attitude as those who she calls “popular.” At least the “popular people” are NOT Mika’s friends. They’re somewhat expected ro be rude. But Ariana still managed to betray Mika (who is her friend) even after all they’ve been through. That’s what happens when hurt people hurt other people. SAD but TRUE. Tip : Finish the whole video and you’ll understand Ariana’s betrayal.

To finish my story, soon the bullies were finally caught. My younger brother also became a victim of one of the bullies in school. He told my mom about it and that caused my mom to finally believe me and seek help from the school. In my fourth year, our pastor and principal called the bullies and asked for their side. They were supposed to be expelled in school (they won’t graduate). The mom of the bullies’ leader cried and asked us to forgive her “bully/popular” daughter. At that time, I already had the chance to get even with them but I still decided to let them stay in school with a condition that they won’t bully me anymore.

I’ve been bullied for 5 years by different people in school; I only had a few months to experience a bully-free life before graduating. 😧 Now I was able to see most of my “popular/bully” classmates in Facebook. Some of them are still bullies so I have to block them. Who wants to be updated by them anyway?

A few years ago, I saw one of the bullies and unfortunately, we took the same transportation — I paid for her fare. I asked Ms Popular/Bully, “Did you remember how you bullied me before?” She said, “I’m sorry. I don’t remember.” Then I told her that I’ve forgiven her. She was silent in the whole 2-hr travel we had. Is she guilty? I hope so. Some of those who bullied me were already pregnant even before we graduated… and my family-in-law who bullied me? God loves them and soon it’s a great opportunity to share them the gospel.

I’m proud that I’m a victim of bullies. I am what I am now because of the pain they gave me. I have no one to run to but God alone.. that’s why I became better instead of being bitter.

I salute the honesty of this song. Bullying is already rampant these days that we tend to ignore it and its effects. It’s even easier for other people to bully and make fun of others through social media — forgetting that bullying can be in any form of hurting and making fun of other people.

Even those who are “popular” seems to be not aware of their actions. Don’t be a victim! Help those who were bullied and being bullied NOW. They need love, comfort and assurance. Stop bullying! Stop encouraging others to bully. Stand for yourself and the bullied person around you! Here are more videos that fight against bullying :

Hopeful : Bars and Melody

Anting-Anting : Sponge Cola feat. Gloc-9 & Denise Barbacena

Katulad ng Iba : Gloc-9 feat. Zia Quizon